Children's mental health

After a few sessions, the counsellor felt that Charlotte’s symptoms of depression and anxiety were serious enough for us to be informed. Charlotte told us about the counselling and we talked about the depression and anxiety. I wasn’t concerned when she told us she’d been talking to a counsellor – it was nothing to be worried about. I was glad she’d been getting some help when she felt she needed it.

The next step was to go to our GP and see what he recommended. He’s a good bloke, very caring, and has known Charlotte since she was a baby. GPs can refer to a range of health professionals like psychologists or child psychiatrists. In our case, he referred Charlotte to a paediatrician, who prescribed some medication, as well as helped Charlotte by just talking to her. I found it hard to come to terms with Charlotte being on medication, but it helped her a lot and eventually I came around to it. 

When I found out that my daughter was depressed, I had mixed feelings about it because I, myself, have suffered from severe depression. On the one hand, I felt so worried and fearful about what she might be going through, based on my own experience. But on the other hand, I felt that I was able to offer her some good advice and understanding since I’ve come through such tough times myself. She didn’t necessarily think I understood at the time but now she realises that I do have a certain amount of insight.

We talked to her teachers a lot – every couple of months – which was mostly because she had trouble with her school work, and they were very helpful. But on a personal level I didn’t really talk to anyone about Charlotte’s troubles. We wanted to keep it in the family. I did talk to my mother a couple of times and I found that helpful. In order to keep myself relaxed I like to keep fit. When the weather is cooler I do a lot of long-distance running, which is very important to me.

I don’t think that depression or anxiety are things you grow out of or get cured of. But you can learn to manage them. Charlotte has managed them really well. Right now, she’s much more settled and I think a big part of that is that she’s finished school and is enjoying uni a lot. She’s also learned that you don’t need everybody to like you – you just need a handful of really good friends. Some of those lessons come to everyone as they grow up, but when you have a mental illness, it can be difficult to learn them.

As for myself, I’ve learned to listen to my children. Sometimes you just have to let them make their own mistakes. 

Children are to be safeguarded at all cost